"Your child is not giving you a hard time. Your child is having a hard time."
This is quite possibly one of my all time favourite parenting related quotes.
Toddler tantrums can be immensely hard to deal with, and that's why it's our job to not join in on their chaos, but to create calm.
Our little people are feeling big emotions and don't quite know how to regulate them yet. It's an important time to ensure we are being gentle with them and it's also important to remember it's not their fault. It's a developmental stage we should support them through, not punish them for.
When my two year old is essentially having a massive melt down over something, I simply pick her up, give her a cuddle and walk away from whatever is causing these big emotions.
For example, yesterday morning after I had finished preparing her breakfast, she decided she wanted to have something else. Cue screaming, banging her head against the cupboard and hitting herself.
I simply scooped her up, told her everything was going to be okay and that we could have that breakfast item tomorrow, as I've already prepared her breakfast today. I brought her into the bedroom to change her clothes as a distraction and by the time we went back out to the high chair, she had forgotten all about the other breakfast item.
It's also important to remember that little ones aren't always able to communicate what they want or need and this can be quite frustrating for them. They could also be overly tired or something they have eaten could be affecting them negatively.
We should not hold our children to higher expectations than adults. Quite often as adults, we can't always explain why it is that we are upset or we are overly emotional when overtired. Displays of emotion should never result in punishment.
I'm a first-time mother and I've found that I can't go out with my son without somebody giving me advice on how to raise him. There seems to be a general assumption that new parents have no idea about children, and it is everybody's duty to share their wisdom.