How do you stop yourself from getting so worked up?
So kids have to test the boundaries, but how do we set those boundaries and how do we punish them for overstepping them?
This week started off well – the boys were being really good as we had someone staying with us, but unfortunately, as soon as our house guest left, they let loose big time.
They say kids let themselves go whenever they are with their primary caregiver and mine sure have done. No more manners, no sitting at the table to eat, and some meals take over an hour for them to consume even though they are “hungry” before and after.
One child has a habit of swearing, which is back again after he held it in for the visitor and I’m sure it’s getting worse. Screaming at me, throwing things at me, shouting at me because they want their own way, trying to help themselves to Halloween lollies when I have said no. Awake at 5am wanting TV on and then tired and cranky when it's school time. So what do I do?
I have tried reward charts, not shouting, treats as rewards, making dinner time fun, encouraging them to eat, cooking easy foods, cooking their favourites etc. I try not to shout, but I really am at the end of my tether as I have no idea how I can punish them without hurting myself mentally.
I have banned after-school playtime with their friends, and I am close to banning them from attending parties, but this affects me as this is my time to socialise with other parents. By me taking them home, I have to deal with them in a confined space, whereas if I let them play, they aren’t right on top of me, in my face constantly or overusing “muuuum”.
I love my kids, I really do, but they have to learn that there are consequences for our actions in life. They need to know that they can’t do whatever they want, whenever they want. They are both street/school angels and home devils that bounce off each other so I don’t often have to discipline in public, which I am grateful for. However, I do need them to realise that yes they can let loose at home, but there are still some rules to abide by.
How do you punish your children? How do you stop yourself from getting so worked up?
I'm a first-time mother and I've found that I can't go out with my son without somebody giving me advice on how to raise him. There seems to be a general assumption that new parents have no idea about children, and it is everybody's duty to share their wisdom.